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July 2, 2015

Starting Intern Year


Hi all! Coming in today/tonight with a little late night post because I'm still working nights and (getting ready to say what one should never speak out loud...) it has been a relatively quiet night for the first time since I started! And just like magic, *my pager just went off*... brb!

Ok thankfully it was a quick question! So far intern year has been awesome. I won't lie, there are days I already drag my butt getting ready for work because I'm not looking forward to leaving, but I really think that has more to do with the fact that it's 8:30pm by the time I leave and I'd rather be cuddled up with my babes on the couch! Once I'm here my energy revs up and I'm ready to take on the night! I plan on doing another day in the life type post soon to give you guys an idea of a typical shift as night float intern, so I won't get into the gory details now, instead I'll just touch a bit on the transition itself!

For one - I have awesome co-interns. I purposefully chose a hospital that was the closest commute from home (nothing beats a quick 10 minute drive home), but I've never worked or rotated here before so I wasn't quite sure what I was getting into when it came down to the house staff. Thankfully I couldn't have gotten a more fun and down-to-earth group of docs to celebrate and commiserate with - we had some great bonding during orientation and I know we will continue to grow closer as we rotate through together!


What I was most worried about? Liv of course. But having my MIL living with us (you can read more about that here) is really worth its weight in gold, and I never leave the house feeling guilty or worried about how she'll do - they absolutely adore each other. And with this night float schedule (roughly 9pm-7am), I actually get to see her first thing in the morning as she's waking up, then I lock myself in my room and sleep for a couple of hours (thank goodness for my eye mask and ear plugs - sleeping during the day is just not normal for me), and then get to hang out with her all late afternoon and evening - playing with her, getting dinner ready, and some days even squeezing a bath in all before I leave again around 8:30. It's been pretty sweet. The one thing that has been the most rough is spending time with N. He's on a normal day shift, so most days he's out of the house before I get in in the morning and sometimes isn't back until after I leave. But communicating throughout the day definitely helps big time, and the best part of night float of course, is that I work Sunday night-Thursday night, so I actually get my weekends off (for this rotation at least). And he does too. So weekends are our time and we make the most of them!

Ok, back to the hospital. As night float intern I'm basically covering for 6 different teams' patients - some days I can be lucky and it means only 25 patients, but most days it's been averaging around 45, sometimes even more. That means should anything come up with any one of those patients I get a page about it, whether a patient wants something to help her sleep or a patient has a change in mental status or new chest pain, really you name it and I'll get paged about it. I work with another resident (someone at least a year my senior), but they are responsible for dealing with the new admissions that come in, while I handle all the inpatients. They are certainly there as extra back up should I need it, but I'm the front line. Which was terrifying at first (and still is especially when I'm dealing with something new), but it's amazing how quickly you learn and figure out things. At this point in our training we're not expected to know much, but we are expected to know what we don't know and call for help when it's needed. Just two nights ago I had a patient who I had seen just an hour earlier now desatting to the low 80s, using her accessory muscles to breathe, and really not looking good (she was sweaty and really struggling). I started with basic quick fixes - bumping up her oxygen, switching to a nonrebreather, getting an ABG and stat portable chest x ray (and paged my resident of course), paged respiratory, but when they didn't come and my resident arrived I gave him the quick rundown of the situation and told him I think we should call a rapid response. At the end of the day it comes down to what the nurses on the floor can handle and our nurses were doing all they could and this woman was still going down. We called the rapid response, and we ended up transferring her to the ICU where she eventually had to be intubated. At the end of all that, my resident and the ICU resident both came up to me later and said "good call." Moments like these are the times it 1) just feels good to hear since in medicine we so rarely get positive feedback, and 2) you actually start developing your own clinical intuition and feeling like you may actually be able to do this after all. The moments like these make the endless pages and order-writing and busy work worth it.

Alright, enough late-night rambling from me. Time to have a snack and feed this growing belly! (Which I also forgot to mention, but thankfully incubating baby does not seem too upset by this new insane schedule mama is working as long as I eat plenty of snacks throughout the night and stay hydrated. Best of all he or she has already started moving around and kicking in there, which is the best feeling - puts a smile on my face every time).


I hope you all have a wonderful 4th of July weekend and enjoyed this post!! xoxo

June 22, 2015

Planning Out Your Life

Happy Monday all! Sorry I've been a little MIA - things have been crazy (although crazy seems to be the new norm) getting ready to start intern year - we just wrapped up orientation last Friday and today is my first day! More like tonight is my first day, since I start on night float! A little terrifying, but then again every first day is!


But new job aside, today I wanted to talk about something that I've been getting emails about nonstop - planning your life. It's all too easy to look at somebody who is now at Point G and assume they've had it all planned out that way since Point A. People look at the graduation photo with N, me and Liv and assume we got there in some linear fashion - wrong! Now don't get me wrong, I've always known I wanted to be a doctor, to be a wife, to be a mother, and more, but I really think people (especially young women) need to be a little easier on themselves when it comes time to getting those "boxes" checked off.

Now the medical school part, that obviously takes a lot of planning. And that is where all of my focus went throughout college (I went to Smith College by the way, have been getting lots of questions about that too lately)! At that time I had a boyfriend (a horribly controlling emotionally abusive coward of a man who I spent seven years with and have never ever mentioned on this blog until now) but was never worried about the marriage and kids part, those would come on their own time. My days were spent carefully planning out my time between a full-time course load, 2-3 jobs, and hanging out with my girlfriends. Thankfully I finally got out of my crappy relationship (after finally escaping off to Europe for a month) just in time for the next milestone - graduating college and starting medical school!

By the time I started medical school I was fresh into a new relationship too (this time with a friend from high school who I reconnected with shortly after college). But the goal at this time was to survive medical school. To get to know a new city and figure out living on my own. Although this time, feeling a little older and little more ready for the next step, I also made plans for the future - I got an apartment instead of living in the dorms, thinking he'd eventually move in, I rearranged my work/study schedule to have my weekends free to spend time with him. I was really thinking about the marriage checkbox this time. But thankfully, 7 years of a horrible relationship taught me a thing or two about what I deserved, and when I realized he wasn't changing I moved on. Many people don't like to admit it, but once you get to know someone, you almost immediately know if they're the right person or not. We tell ourselves "they'd be perfect if they just..." or "once he does xyz then..." And we stay in relationships, for years, waiting for those things. But not me, not anymore.

Not too long after N and I were closer than ever. He was my closest friend during med school, but I never looked at him like that. Once I was actually single and an outside friend commented on how perfect we were for each other, though, something clicked. And because we were friends and had already had long talks about our past and long talks about our future, I knew who he was without the facade of dating. Once we were together we knew we made a powerful team, and for the first time ever there was no "he'd be perfect if..." He was perfect just the way he was. And when he proposed just two months after us getting together, my answer was an easy hell yes. And when we decided we might as well start trying to have kids since it would probably take a couple of years, that was an easy decision too. Of course, we never expected it to happen on the first try. We rotate through infertility clinic and see first-hand the women in their twenties who have been trying for years and can't get pregnant. We thought our story would be like theirs. Was my baby check box on the list? Well, sure. But it was supposed to come after the marriage check box which was supposed to come after the finish med school checkbox. Did I let that phase me? No! Although it was a blessing I wasn't quite sure I was ready for, it was still the greatest blessing! And now fast forward two years and we're ready for the second little blessing!

I write all this, not just to share what's probably way too much personal information, but to illustrate all the little twists and turns that life throws at us! Although you can look at someone who is now in a place where you want to be, don't assume they got there by following their plans exactly! The point is really this - it's wise to plan for the future - to set goals for yourself and have an idea of where you want to be in 5, 10, 15 years. But learn to go with the flow, to open up to something that wasn't on the list (or not in that order on the list) and you'll find yourself a much happier person. And never ever look at one picture and think it was planned like that from day 1 ;)

June 4, 2015

Pre-Residency Vacation

Happy Thursday ya'll (as I type that I'm slightly freaking out that it is already Thursday)! I hope you all have had a pleasant and productive week! Even though I'm out of the first trimester my exhaustion hasn't gone away yet, it needs to asap! Today I'm sharing a few photos from our trip to Miami and The Virgin Islands!


We stayed at The Biltmore in Coral Gables - we were attending a wedding there and thankfully they had a group discount! The hotel was beautiful and although it screamed old money it didn't feel completely exclusive - they truly showed amazing hospitality. 


The wedding itself was unlike anything N and I had ever seen before - there was even a freaking fireworks display that was better than my hometown's Fourth of July show. It was all breathtakingly beautiful and we couldn't be happier for the couple. 


After the wedding we flew off to St. Thomas to finally squeeze in our own little honeymoon (we never went on ours since we got straight into residency applications) and it was just what we needed. We stayed at the exact same place I wrote about here and it felt like coming home.


We visited my favorite beach, Trunk Bay, and swam (carefully, I wasn't trying to die) with sting ray and fish! It was beautiful!


We left after sunset and had dinner in St. John. The pic on the right is the view from our resort lobby! 


We did lots of lounging on the beds in our own little piece of paradise at our resort. All in all it was a perfect trip, although we missed Liv terribly! So thankful we've got the next couple of weeks to spend some quality time with her before we both start intern year! 

Shop my wedding outfits and vacation essentials here! Just click any of the images below!





May 29, 2015

Harvard Medical School Graduation!

Hi all! This month has absolutely flown by - once we wrapped up classes, making sure we had everything set for graduation and then getting away for a little vacation (will share pics soon!) made the month go by in a flash! Yesterday came the day I feel like we've been waiting for since high school - we finally became doctors! After all the dreaming and doubting and working hard and ups and downs and a wedding and a baby (and another on the way), we finally became Harvard MDs! Sharing a few pics from the day below as well as a little collage from our time in med school! Thank you all so much for your sweet messages and supporting us all along!!


and now some throwbacks!!
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